Sunday, February 3, 2013

Moving Forward by Looking Backward

"If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe" -Carl Sagan
    Who was Sagan? An astronomer. And a Jew. And once upon a time, a little boy who was amazed at the wonders of the world, and had questions, thoughts, and feelings about the vastness of the universe. And so, the little boy turned out to be a great astronomer, who added astounding information on planets and stuff like that to the compilations of things the world has come to know. Just like that. Bam, huge success story. Why can't we all be like that? I mean we're not all gonna be astronomers and rocket scientists, but we too look at the stars and wonder, yet no one i know has become an astronomer.

    We all have moments in our personal lives, where we wonder about the vastness of the world. Avraham did that, and look what came of it. We think, we look, we see, we feel, we do. But do we do? Or do we just think we do?  Recently I've heard a lot of opinions that were new to me. I went to speeches, heard people out, thought about things, eh who am I kidding, I don't think, I'm impulsive. So I sat down to try and get things together.

       So that quote on top of the page?  I heard a speech from Rabbi Skaist this week. In it he redefined "emunah peshutah" for many people. Sometimes people think emunah peshuta means I belive in Hashem, whatver, I feel it, I know it, I learned it, mostly based on feeling. But as he said we all know a time we've had a feeling, and the next week it turned into a nothing. Feelings come and go. So, he said what do is emunah peshuta based on? The belief in a mesorah. The belief that we got the Torah at Har Sinai and that it was passed down generation to generation til it got to me. So I believe in the mesorah which in turn connects me to Hashem.

     I thought that was beautiful because it's permanent, it's long lasting proof of our legacy, and it's applicable to our everyday lives. But then I started getting uneasy about it. I tried to connect to that concept of the mesorah and my parents and parents before them... but I really did not relate to it. I'm not necessarily that much of a logical person, so I was missing the feeling in it.... But then what happened, I started thinking of myself. Where did I come from? I am a living proof that generations before me existed. I could not have come into this world without a legacy of people fighting, living, laughing, dancing, building. I wouldn't exist! And the world as I know it wouldn't exist, because everyone comes from somewhere and even that somewhere comes from somewhere and it doesn't end til Adam Harishon.

      So basically, what I'm trying to give over here, and would like to spread the word about, is if you're having a hard time with Emunah, the Rabbi's say, don't try and feel it, that won't stay long. Believe in the Mesorah, in your past, in Har Sinai, and that will connect you to Hashem. But I want to talk to  those who can not relate to that concept. Do what I am trying to do. It's working for me. Took a couple days until the clarity came through, but I like this feeling. It's solid stable grounded, spirituality. Though it still hovers in the air, and that's fun. It's a feeling of I believe that a whole world of people one generation at a time starting looking backward with me and my parents and grandparents as far back as I know, and then each generation before them until Har Sinai, stood at Har Sinai, received the Torah, passed down the legacy for years and years and years, so what I learn, and see and feel every day, is in essence straight from Har Sinai, though with a bit of a shipping fee. The shipping fee, is somewhat of a blindness. A fog has settled somewhere in between generations. But we can clear it up. If you look around you and start to think. Think about how you wouldn't exist in this world had there not been people preceding you, think about the fact that you are here now, and that there are reasones for being here. Think about the future, what you'll send down the line. And then do. Act on it. Live a wholesome life, in whatever unique way you can. But don't ever forget where you come from. And don't ever forget Who is over you at all times, who has a Master Plan for you. Look back, see where you've been, see how you've become, and move forward towards a life of light filled joy.  Have a good week!